Sunday, November 24, 2013
Marriage
This is sure to be a controversial topic, as I am torn on my own opinion. Is marriage a factor that leads to happiness? Some would suggest that marriage is; others would contend that it is something that inevitably leads to dissatisfaction and discontentment for the two involved and destroys what could have otherwise been a "perfect" long lasting romantic relationship. The reason I am torn is because I can come up with a logical argument for both sides. In one light, it is only natural to believe that marriage will lead to happiness. In fact, a report from Michigan State suggests that marriage may make people happier. Human companionship is one of our psychological needs. We weren't created to be alone, we naturally desire the company of others and most of us love attention if from no other than but one special person. Marriage is the ultimate form of human companionship, especially if you are married to someone you consider your "best" friend. In the other light, being with someone for long periods of time can become boring and listless. Take, for example, staying at a friend’s house for two weeks. For the first couple nights or so you have a great time, enjoying every moment of it. Then as the days roll on you start to get irritated with little things your friend does or says and you have less fun than you did at the beginning of your stay. You may become bored if all you do is stay in the house all day and play the same games or watch the same shows. Marriage, even longstanding romantic relationships, can have the same kind of dull patches that last even longer. However in a marriage you are legally bound to each other and leaving can cause more trouble than it’s worth, so you wind up staying in a marriage that you no longer want to be in. That is in no way conducive to happiness. I can see both sides of the spectrum, and I am not sure which one would end up winning out.Some people do not want to get married for the very reason I stated; they believe that once they "get used" to each other, they will get bored and be stuck in the relationship. What do you think? Does marriage lead to happiness? If it does, is it only temporary?
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I think marriage will only lead to happiness if you do it for the right reasons. If you are forced into marriage, marry because of pregnancy, or even marry for money/stability, chances are you will not end up happy. If you are in a relationship with someone who you are in love with and can tolerate, I think your marriage will lead to happiness. Sure, people can get on each other's nerves if they are with someone for too long, but that's just part of life and if they can't work out living and being with someone else, I think they need to work on their personable and cooperative skills before jumping into a marriage.
ReplyDeleteI want to say when it comes to women, marriage can be a big factor in overall lifetime happiness. We are basically trained to look forward to marriage and motherhood from childhood. The playhouses, Barbie doll families, and Disney Princess movies are all examples of how women should act and be. All of the princesses are married, some are independent, but still married nonetheless. Think about it, even the teen magazines are centered around how to look good to attract guys.
ReplyDeleteSo marriage is one of those magical stepping stones in life such as college, motherhood, and retirement where women feel as though we will be generally happier in life with it.
I absolutely love your topics. They're interesting and fun to think about.
ReplyDeleteAs for this post, I think it really depends on your relationship with that person and how much you understand one another. I think it's very difficult to find a person that you will never get tired of.. nearly impossible. The key is to be able to have a group of friends to hang out with or a hobby that you can do without your significant other. Marriage can very much so lead to happiness and even be the happiest years of your life by far. But you have to be able to understand each other and know when to get away. If it's meant to be, you won't be away for very long. I'm not saying up and leave for weeks at a time or anything like that, I'm just saying have an escape for a few hours with your buddies or even by yourself. Just to focus your thoughts on something else. You'll be surprised at how soon you start missing her.
I'm glad you brought this up! It is such a huge milestone, especially for people our age. Personally, I think I could be happy whether I marry or not. I would prefer to have someone to share life with, but if I am not sure I can make the commitment then I'll stay single and be content. It is important to me also that I am not depending on someone else to make or break my happiness. Basically, marriage is a bonus not a necessity and it comes down to deciding if you both can make to commitment.
ReplyDeleteI see what you're saying, Denzel, but I don't think it's a matter of which came first, the chicken or the egg? No one should get married thinking that it is going to make them happy.. otherwise they will be in for a rude awakening. Marriage is hard, hard work-- just like any relationship. If you put in that hard work, then your marriage will thrive and yes, that can make you happy. But personally, I think it is a skewed perception to think that getting married will make you happy.
ReplyDeleteI think the single statement, "marriage leads to happiness" is absolutely bizarre. Those who are getting married to achieve that happiness will certainly be disappointed because marriage does not equal happiness. I read an article where a guy stated that he did not marry to make himself happy. Marriage is truly about selfishness and I think many people often forget that.
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